Sometimes you know you should sleep, but your body just isn't cooperating. You're not sleepy, your mind is active, and lying in bed feels pointless. This can happen after a stressful day, when you've had too much caffeine, or when your schedule is off. Here's what to do when you need to sleep but can't.
Lying in bed trying to sleep when you're not tired creates anxiety about not sleeping, which makes it harder to sleep. If you've been in bed for 20 minutes and aren't even close to falling asleep, get up. Do something boring in dim light (read a dull book, listen to a calm podcast) and come back when you feel drowsy.
If you can, delay your bedtime by 30-60 minutes. Use the extra time to do something calming (stretching, reading, journaling). The later bedtime means more time awake, which builds adenosine (the sleepiness chemical).
Your body needs to drop 2-3°F to fall asleep. Take a warm shower 1-2 hours before bed (the subsequent cooling triggers sleepiness), lower your thermostat to 65-68°F, or use a cooling mattress pad.
Lie in bed with your eyes closed. Focus your attention on your toes for 15 seconds. Then your feet. Then your calves. Move slowly up your body. Don't try to change anything, just notice. Most people fall asleep before reaching their head.
Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7, exhale for 8. Repeat 3-4 times. The long exhale activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which promotes relaxation and sleepiness.
If your mind is racing, write it all down. A "worry dump" or a to-do list for tomorrow offloads the thoughts from your brain onto paper. Your brain can relax once it knows the thoughts are captured.
Set a consistent sleep schedule with our free Sleep Calculator and your body will learn when it's time to sleep.
No. If you're not sleepy after 20 minutes, get up. Lying in bed awake trains your brain to associate the bed with wakefulness. Go to another room, do something boring, and return when you feel drowsy.
Stay up until you're sleepy, not just tired. There's a difference: tired means your body is fatigued, sleepy means your eyes are heavy and you're nodding off. Going to bed when you're tired but not sleepy leads to lying awake.
Low-dose melatonin (0.5-1 mg) taken 3-4 hours before your desired bedtime can help shift your circadian clock, but it won't make you sleepy on demand. It's a clock-shifter, not a sedative.
You probably missed your sleep window. The tiredness at 9 PM was your body's natural sleep signal, and once it passed, your body produced cortisol to keep you going. Next time, go to bed when you first feel sleepy, even if it's earlier than planned.